Louise Mensch is Prime Minister

Yes, after several hours listening carefully on the phone, the QO can exclusively reveal that as part of a complicated backroom deal involving the 1922 Committee, Angela Merkel, Piers Morgan and several shadowy figures from private equity firms, Louise Mensch has agreed to take over as Prime Minister of Greece.

Outgoing Greek Premier George Papandreou said in a packed press conference: "I believe it's time to stand down in favour of someone who is well aware of the downside of fractional reserve banking and, by the way, is something of a χαριτωμένο κορίτσι, as we say in Greek. Cute, I think is your term."

Mrs Mensch dimpled prettily before launching into an incisive commentary on the limitations of fractional reserve banking, and why Piers Morgan was a waste of skin. She said that she was committed to ensuring that every Greek citizen was able to retire at 48, as she intended to, and further pledged herself to stabilising the Greek economy while continuing to press Rupert Murdoch and News International on their disgraceful behaviour, seeing that Chris Huhne was dealt with according to law, restoring the British armed forces to their former glory, and helping her good friend the Quizzical Observer to bang out the most cynical, half-baked blog post of the week.

The QO was understood to be in hiding, but through his newly appointed media consultant, Andy Coulson, denied that he was just seeing how many Google hits he could work into four paragraphs and a photo ripped off from the Guardian.